9 Things Theresa May Is Unlikely To Say To Trump When They Tête a Tête

Because it’s impossible to write anything on the internet without mentioning the POTUS (heck, it’ll probably be illegal soon), here’s some Friday fun for you – we’ll wager “Mother” Theresa won’t be bringing these thorny subjects up during her one-to-one with the Donald.

  1. Tell me about your mother…
  2. Do you like my leather trousers – they’re made from vulcanised rubber actually, so they won’t perish…do you want me to dance for you?
  3. Have you seen the wall that China built 2,000 years ago to keep the foreigners out? Great, isn’t it?
  4. Make it quick, Don, I’ve got tickets to “Hamilton” tonight.
  5. It’s great to see you putting so much faith in Pence…look after him and the pounds will take care of themselves.
  6. Holy Guacamole, the snacks here are terrible – where can I get a decent Burrito?
  7. I’m a big fan of fashion, actually, love materials, love Muslin…we gotta have more Muslin in the UK – as much as humanly possible.
  8. I’m Theresa, and I ran Homeland Security for the UK for 10 years while stupid White men ruined the country – you’re fired!
  9. Wonderful people, Americans, I’ve always had a great relationship with, uh, America, right, America – the American people love me – I have great respect for America – great respect you know?

And one thing they will agree on!

“That Piers Morgan – w*nker, isn’t he!”

%d bloggers like this: